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Spouse Says Lafave Radically Changed Before Her Arrest

By THOMAS W. KRAUSE tkrause@tampatrib.com

Published: Nov 23, 2005

TAMPA - -- In the weeks before Debra Lafave's arrest, the middle school teacher's personality change so swiftly and so drastically that it started a rift with her husband.

"Who the hell are you?" Owen Lafave said he screamed at her. "You're not my wife."

Owen Lafave recalled the fight to prosecutors when they interviewed him in March. A transcript of the conversation was released Tuesday with hundreds of pages of other documents. Multiple interviews her family and friends show details of a troubled young teacher having problems keeping her life on track.

Debra Lafave, now 25, was arrested in June 2004 and charged with sexually abusing a 14-year-old student. On Tuesday she pleaded guilty in a deal that puts her on house arrest for three years and probation for an additional seven.

Her attorney, John Fitzgibbons, had filed court documents saying he would use an insanity defense should the case go to trial.

Friends, co-workers and her husband -- who has filed for divorce -- said she had an eating disorder, was obsessed with cleanliness and was taking medication for bipolar disorder and depression.

Owen Lafave said his wife told him she was raped when she was 13 and that the rapes occurred inside a middle school when she was a student. An older boy was the culprit, she told her husband. Owen Lafave said his wife blamed the rapes for the intermittent sexual problems in their relationship.

Pamela Glas, a fellow teacher interviewed by prosecutors, said Debra Lafave told her the rapes made her more promiscuous.

Fitzgibbons said the rapes and mental condition would have been included in her insanity defense.

"At trial, we were prepared to discuss the impact of the sexual assault when she was young," Fitzgibbons said. "And we would have discussed her over-10-year struggle with bipolar illness."

Also discussed in the documents released Tuesday was the death of Lafave's only sister, who was killed by a drunken driver in 2001. The illegal relationship with the student coincided with the anniversary of the accident.

Not everyone in Debra Lafave's life thought she had mental issues. Casie Martinez, who had a lesbian relationship with her in high school, told prosecutors that Lafave was under great pressure from her mother but kept herself well centered. Martinez said Lafave was told what to wear and how to act, more so than most teenage girls.

She knew that Lafave had an eating disorder but told prosecutors it was the result of her mother wanting her to be thin.

In interviews with prosecutors, several co-workers and friends, as well as Owen Lafave, said Debra Lafave had emotional ups and downs. Many said she often spoke in childlike phrases, especially when speaking to her mother.

Sometimes, Owen Lafave said, his wife would be vocal and outgoing, often inappropriately discussing with others intimate details of her sex life. Conversely, there were times when his wife would withdraw from everyone, including him, isolating herself in their home.

In the weeks before Lafave's arrest, Owen Lafave began to suspect she was having a relationship with a student's father. He told prosecutors he had no idea the relationship was with a student.

He said his fears of an affair were spurred by a rapid change in personality. In less than a month, he said, his wife began to smoke, started listening to rap music and began to dress like a teenager, often wearing "skimpy" clothing.

On the day Debra Lafave was arrested, her husband got a call from his mother-in-law. She said Debra Lafave had just been arrested for a lewd and lascivious act with a student. Owen Lafave told prosecutors he did not react.

"OK, what do I need to do?" he asked his mother-in-law.

In the coming days, he helped the family hire a lawyer but told his wife their marriage was over.

Despite discussing intimate details with prosecutors, Owen Lafave would not offer information about his wife'ssexual relations with the student.

The day Debra Lafave posted bail, the couple sat next to her parent's swimming pool and talked. Debra Lafave cried loudly and apologized.

When asked what she said and why she was apologizing, Owen Lafave invoked his marital privilege. Spouses cannot be compelled to discuss details of their conversations.